Friday, December 10, 2010

A Word on Femininity


The following is a blog post I wrote for 1251: Queen of All Hearts. A blog devoted to sharing how a few women dress modestly. Enjoy!

How many of us would love to be described by others as feminine… enchanting… ravishing… captivating… charming… and alluring? Now, how many of us know of a woman in our life that fits these adjectives? Few come to my mind in the full sense of the word, and most have lived their lives and are now gone from this world. What does this say to us, except that it is a rarity to find a woman who enchants those around her with grace, compassion, humble listening, and a feminine nature.

Wait, wasn’t this supposed to be a blog about clothing?!

Right. Right. But think of those words again: feminine… enchanting… ravishing… captivating… charming… and alluring. Do these words come to mind when you think of dressing modestly?

Every woman desires to be beautiful, and each one of us would, I daresay, blush with embarrassment (albeit be more than pleased) if a dashingly handsome man complimented us with, “You look quite ravishing today, my lady.” But, alas! We live in the 21st century when most chivalry and respect has disappeared from common society… as has modesty. However, there still remains a place for modesty. And this is where it all begins…

Of all the women you may have imagined at the beginning of this post, I will bet that most of them dressed very modestly. Now, when you look up “modest” in the dictionary, you certainly won’t find those adjectives, but the true definition of modesty is found in those women. How is this so? Because -when a woman truly knows her dignity, knows of her deep and indispensable value to humankind, when she knows of her unique gifts, those of being a woman and being utterly irreplaceable, she will not only carve her way into the world with the love, light, and service she possesses, but she will take utmost care in communicating this inner beauty on her outside.

And so it is with you and I.

It is only until we understand our indispensable value - being a woman, and yes, being you, that we will begin to cultivate those virtues, serving those around us, and yes, dressing to reflect that beauty we each hold inside of us.

Sometimes I relate it to giving a gift to another, for that is what a woman is; she is truly a gift to humanity, one of the greatest treasures - each one a crown of creation. Now, picture a gift. This gift is a unique item, so unique in fact that no other exists of its kind on the planet. It is rare, and it is expensive. It is so beautiful that before the giver placed it in the box to be wrapped, many oohed and aahed over its beauty, others were reduced to silent awe. But tucked away, with many layers of tissue paper and into a sturdy box it was laid. A soft silver wrapping was carefully placed around the box and silk ribbons of a deep ruby were tied to fix the wrapping in place. All finished, it certainly was magnificent to behold, but still not anywhere near the beauty which remained tucked deep inside. It was ready to be given, but first another present needed to be wrapped. This one also of inestimable value, but quite different and unique in its own way. It also received the applaud and reverence of those who saw it before it was wrapped. However, this one was not done so carefully. Instead, it was placed in an old, beat up box with no tissue paper. The paper used to wrap the box wasn’t large enough to cover the whole package, and hastily it was done. In the end, no one would have guessed the beauty which it beheld. And they certainly didn’t. Each gift was given out, and each gift received the tidings itself communicated. I’m sure you know where this story is going by now… but how do you suppose the first gift was treated? Great excitement and intense curiosity inexplicably followed its receiving. For, if the gift looks this marvelous and splendid from the outside, the inside is sure to be a treasure. Unfortunately, the second gift fared much worse. Tossed to the side, due to its lack of interest, this gift was never opened.

And so it is - again - with you and I.

We hold immense power. Each and every day we send a message to the world. This is not only a message that declares to others how we think of ourselves, but also one in which we tell them how to treat us. We do this in our poise, our speech, our actions, and yes, our dress.

It’s certainly not easy choosing what to wear when one knows of her great power, but with great power comes great responsibility. I challenge you to think about those women you thought of at the beginning of this post. Ponder their virtues and their dress. What made them so alluring (to men and women alike)? What made them so feminine? And, how can you work to attain those same virtues, in manner and in dress, so as to give yourself as a gift to others and to reflect that great dignity which has been given to you from above?

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Awaiting the Coming of Our Savior


Blessed Second Week of Advent! This year I have a home to decorate for all seasons and holy days, and I am thoroughly enjoying the challenge of doing so... on a budget! My husband and I wanted to truly live out this season of Advent and we knew that if we decorated too early for Christmas the season of Advent wouldn't penetrate our hearts. Recognizing that the Church created seasons for a reason, we have tried our best to immerse our senses, minds, and hearts into this time of preparation.

Above you can see I did a bit of decorating. Thanks to Charlotte's blog, Waltzing Matilda, I was given some great ideas to help us visually celebrate the season. This season we're focussing on the virtue of patience - but I bet you could've figured that out! Underneath it reads, "We wait in joyful hope." On the left is our Jesse Tree which we started on the First Sunday of Advent, although some Jesse trees begin on December 1st. There is just something about a lit tree that helps a home feel warmer and cozier. I come from a family that traditionally put up the Christmas tree the day after Thanksgiving. Doing a Jesse Tree has helped me focus on the season of Advent while still having the warmth and glow a Christmas tree gives to a home. Lastly, I put up an empty stable and manger, and cut out a silhouette of Mary and Joseph traveling using cardstock (this was also an idea from the Waltzing Matilda blog). This was a very tough project. I am still not completely satisfied as Mary is falling back a bit even after using some support beams (aka popsicle sticks). I do love the look of the silhouette and it certainly is appropriate for Advent.

I spent this second Advent Sunday making pretzel wreaths and chocolate chip cookies for our church's youth group which is in a half hour. We have yet to grab some dinner beforehand, so I need to fly! Peace and blessings to you and yours during this season of Advent!

Friday, December 3, 2010

Old Furniture - New Story


Many of you are aware that we were gifted almost all of the furniture we currently have in our home. Indeed, the only furniture we actually bought for ourselves were our two bookshelves of which we were in desperate need. And, even these we decided to buy fresh from the carpenter. We decided to sand and stain them ourselves and save about $300 in the process. Did we have any idea what we were getting ourselves into? Nope! Did we know it was going to be a lot of work? Yep! Would I want to do it again? Nope! But would I? Was it worth it? Most certainly!

These bookshelves are the result of many, many hours of sweat and shivers (it was very cold outside!). Our apartment neighbors couldn't believe that we were bringing out more furniture (we had just finished our dresser and chest of drawers) as it was on the verge of November. The days and nights were getting steadily colder, and we began having problems with the overcoat starting to freeze and solidify. We had just about had it with these shelves, when we finished! Casey and I both agree that we will treasure these shelves because of all the work we put into them. On top of that, we dipped our hands into a new trade of sorts, and learned a whole bunch in the process.

Here are the results of our labors. Aren't they beautiful? I think they do the job quite nicely.

Prior to working on these shelves we decided to strip, sand, and restain some of the furniture that was handed down to us. One of these pieces was my old dresser. I've had it since my grandma gave it to me as a gift from her antique shop. It was originally painted white with purple lilacs and green leaves. I'm kicking myself now that I didn't take a photo of it before we stripped it. While I liked the paint job in my younger years, I couldn't very well see Casey thinking it was beautiful, too. Plus, it didn't go with our bedroom scheme. So, here's the "before" photo after having stripped it:

Here is what it looks like today. All stained and working as a table for our sacred space:


Lastly - this is my favorite piece! My grandpa gave me a chest of drawers that was originally my Great Grandma Grace's. The story goes that her father made a chest of drawers for each of his daughters. Originally, it was stained a dark mahogany, but after years of use, it had inherited this color:

I personally liked the color, but it didn't go with any of our other furniture. Plus, I wanted to restore it to its original beauty. This was my labor of love. This was my favorite piece to do. It must have had about four layers of paint - white, yellow, green, gold, I counted my way through as I stripped it all off. In the dozens upon dozens of hours I spent on this chest I thought often of my great great grandpa. If he were here, would he be pleased that I was trying to restore it? How many hours had he spent making it? I imagined him carving and cutting the pieces of wood. It's a very intricate piece. What a treasure I have! Finally, after many layers of Citristrip, and sanding it came to look like this:

And in the end, we stained it the same color as the rest of the furniture, and back to its original stain. The knobs are the same, except they were spray painted silver. They are a temporary fix until we buy new knobs - I just need to decide what will look best with the stain. Any ideas??? I'm thinking something dark...

These projects took up most of September and October, and I am so grateful that they are finished! It's time for this furniture to begin their new story as part of our family.

Now I can snuggle up inside our home. It's on to making Christmas gifts, dusting off the keyboards (both computer and piano), and pulling out that sewing machine I have no idea how to operate. This winter is going to involve, oh, so much learning!


The Wind Blows... and Time Flies

My goodness! My last post was written in September! Needless to say, this autumn has been chock full of activities, RE classes, settling in, NT meetings, open gyms, dinners with new friends, Good Shepherd certification, an awesome Catholic conference, hearing Fr. Riccardo speak, and many, many cooking and baking adventures! I truly hope in the next few days and these weeks before Christmas to record and share all of these memories I now hold.

This certainly has been a season of growing. And while I do have a blog to use as an outlet to share these things, and some I SOOO want to share - they are too good not to share! - my natural tendency is to ponder all things in my heart. I could probably go days without talking and just become lost in the world in my head... this can be a virtue and a vice at times. Alas, I still (and will for many years, I estimate) work my way through knowing when to speak and share, and when to keep silent and ponder. Our Lady has been my best model for this. She spoke when necessary, but often we are told, "she pondered all these things in her heart" (Luke 2:51). O Mama Mary, guide me in my words and thoughts; teach me humility and boldness. Intercede that I may have a deeper love for all of His creation. Thank you for your wisdom. Amen.

Alright, my dear friends... the blog writing has resumed!

Friday, September 24, 2010

New home... New chairs

Laura, my mother-in-law, gave us a wonderful dining room set - complete with table and chairs, a bureau, and a china cabinet. They had been in her basement for some years, and the leather covering on the chair seats had gotten quite worn down over the years. I had decided that recovering them would be my first project once we settled in our new home.

Although I've never done such a thing before, or used a staple gun, I figured, how hard can it be? I set out for Hobby Lobby one day and perused their decorative fabric aisles. I knew in my head the colors I wanted to incorporate and the type of design, but I wasn't quite sure if they would have such a thing. Sometimes my ideas and what exists in reality can be far off. Fortunately, that was not the case this day. As soon as I saw it I knew that it would be the fabric for the chairs. I grabbed the roll (I say roll and not bolt because it wasn't with their other fabrics that they keep on bolts... but who knows, maybe this is still considered a bolt).

I had already measured the chair seats prior to this shopping trip, but even so I felt completely intimidated approaching the fabric counter. See, I know next to nothing about fabric - what type of fabric is best for what project, characteristics of each type of fabric, the best way to estimate yardage needed for a project - nope, I have zero smarts in this area... or maybe just lack of experience. Either way, I was hoping that whoever would help me would have some GREAT advice. What a blessing it was then, when the lady who did help me was not only kind, but didn't mind that I had no idea what I was doing. I explained the project and shared my measurements, we laughed together as we both tried to do the math, and then we finally decided where to cut the fabric. Not only was it a pleasant experience, but I learned more about how to use and estimate for my fabric usage!

So, three days and two staple guns later....

This is what I achieved!

The leather on these chairs had been loved A LOT.


The new fabric!


All the supplies I bought (minus scissors) with the wooden chair seat.


The final comparison. I think they turned out fantastically!

So, this project has really encouraged the other endeavors I have cooped up in my head. I would really like to make our apartment feel a bit more homey. With one task under my belt, I have already begun my next project (more like a series of projects): stripping and staining various pieces of furniture, namely, our dresser, a chest of drawers, and two bookshelves. This project will obviously take much more time and precision, but I'll be sure to put up some photos.

My last thought: Last year, as I was teaching, I was saddened of how little I was able to use my hands to do my work. Oh sure, writing on the whiteboard used them, and typing on my computer, but I have always been a kinesthetic learner. I love to play sports, rearrange spaces, to draw, sculpt, cook, bake, etc. I am finally so happy to have the opportunity to work with my hands. Praise God, and thank you!


Thursday, September 9, 2010

Would you cut your toe nails in the pew before Mass?

"Why, of course not!" I hope you thought in your head, or perhaps you chuckled at the ridiculousness and absurdity of such a question, but unfortunately I witnessed just such a thing last evening.

There was a Mass being held to kick-off the religious education program at our church, and afterwards the students would have a chance to meet their teachers. I volunteered to fill in wherever needed this year and an 8th grade position opened up. So... that's where I am! Eighth grade - well, it certainly won't be boring! Anyway, back to the story...

So there I was, I had arrived at Mass some minutes beforehand so that I could prepare to receive our Lord. I try to sit up front in order to not be distracted, which would have been of high probability due to the amount of children, so I sat in the second row. A mother, her two daughters (or a daughter and a friend, I'm not sure which), and her son were sitting in the row ahead of me. While the church was by no means quiet, I knelt down to pray. I noticed as I was putting the kneeler down that the daughter was playing on her cell phone, momentarily I was a bit shocked, but then, not surprised. I was prompted to indignation at the lack of reverence and respect she was showing to our Lord, or rather at the mother's lack of direction to prompt her child to prayer, but I just tried to refocus on preparation for Mass. Not more than a moment later I heard, click, click, click, click.... click, click... and it kept going. It was followed by a whispered, but surprised, "Mom, what are you doing?!" And then a giggle. At this point, I was thoroughly distracted and opened my eyes to see the MOTHER CLIPPING HER TOE NAILS!

And then my heart broke.

Hot, fiery anger rose to my chest, and tears welled up in my eyes. Really? She's clipping her toe nails? In this holy place? Right before we pray together and receive God into our beings? Lord, how could she? Here was a mother who was showing these children that it was not only okay, but also appropriate to clip toe nails in church before Mass. Lord, have mercy. My anger quickly evaporated with my next thought. This woman probably has no idea, and little comprehension, or understanding of the sacredness of the Holy Eucharist. She probably doesn't understand the holiness of the ground on which she stands (or rather, sits). But these children! These poor children who are being led away from sanctity by their mother, the very person who is the primary educator of faith (along with her husband) to her children. She is supposed to lead them to heaven, but rather... well, I can't make presumptions, but would you say that by her actions she was leading her children to heaven?

Not knowing exactly what to do, and wanting to do five different things at once, (grab the clippers, gently explain to the children proper pre-Mass behavior, lecture the mother, cry, or pray fervently for their souls) I settled on a prayer that came immediately to my head: the Fatima prayer. There are many Fatima prayers and I'm not sure if this one has a specific name, but it gave me a chance to pray for this family, for all the families there, and for all those whose ignorance keeps them from loving and adoring our Lord.

My God I believe, I adore, I trust, and I love Thee,
and I ask pardon for all those who do not believe,
do not adore, do not trust, and do not love Thee.
Amen.

I was advised by a priest at my old parish to pray this three times in a row, but I found myself continuing beyond the three times. Throughout the prayer I felt sorrow for the family in front of me. I know that I, too, can be distracted in church, and at times need to be prompted back to reverence. Sometimes it's too easy to casually dismiss the call to proper preparation before Mass. In our humanness we can subconsciously avert our attention from the great mystery of the Holy Eucharist. At that moment, the Lord graced me with a tiny bit of the giant love He has for this family. They don't know any better. The mother might, but her children probably not. And what if she, too, grew up in a similar situation, and is only teaching her children what she knows? They did come to Mass. They didn't blow it off, or stay home to watch television, or whatever else people busy themselves with when they don't want to attend Mass.

In the last minutes before Mass began, I found my prayer raised to praise. Praise you, Lord, for this family, for this mother who brought her children to Mass, for even if she isn't showing the best example of reverence in church, at least by bringing her children to Mass she is showing them that it's important. Thank you, Jesus, for this family and the road they are traveling to holiness.

After all that, Mass began. It was probably the most distracting Mass I've ever been to, but it was Mass, and Jesus was there. I had to chuckle to myself then when at the homily Monsignor told the story of Our Lady of Fatima and taught all the children the prayer I had been prompted to pray before Mass!

Monday, August 30, 2010

Adventures West

It's been a wild ride these past couple weeks. After returning from our honeymoon, Casey and I drove up to Traverse City to rent a Uhaul and to pack up his stuff. We rambled down the highways to my parent's house outside Chicago to pack up all of my stuff, and finally we set off on the highway yet again to make a new home outside Des Moines, Iowa.

As a young girl I used to read Janette Oke books that were gifted to me. If you're unfamiliar with her writing, she writes Christian historical romance novels. I'm sure if I were to reread them now I would find them a bit cheesy, but to my young heart they gave a vision to the kind of man and the life I wanted to live if I were to get married, minus the covered wagons of course; they wouldn't exactly fit into this 21st century (sometimes my heart wishes they did, but I'll leave that for another post). It was precisely the scene of the newly married couple, sitting in their covered wagon along with their few belongings preparing to go West, that has stayed in my mind all these years. The adventure, the risk, and the act of truly leaving family and clinging to one another was and is absolutely beautiful to me.

I haven't thought of these books for years, but as Casey and I started off on the road, substituting a 26-foot Uhaul and tow dolly for the covered wagon, that scene popped back into my head. Here I was, a bride leaving family behind and setting off "West" with my husband to a place neither of us knew, but would soon be calling our home. I imagined along the way the hardships that those traveling West did experience, and thanked the Lord that that wasn't the case for us. Thank you, Lord, for paved highways! We arrived at our new apartment safely and soundly, and that's when the real fun began: unpacking. Praise the Lord for my super strong and hardworking husband! We both started bringing boxes into the apartment, but I really wanted to start unpacking the kitchen boxes. I knew Casey would be working up an appetite with moving all of our belongings. My wonderful husband didn't mind at all bringing in the rest of the boxes himself, and this allowed me to take care of at least one room.

It's been exactly one week since we arrived, and today was Casey's first day of work at his new job as Director of Faith Formation at a local parish. Casey and I both would like to live off of one income and hopefully have me available to stay home with our children, if God so blesses us. We decided we would like to start off living this way from the beginning, so today was my first day not going to work while Casey did. I have to admit, it's been a bit... different - of course, because I've never been a wife that didn't work before! But really, I've had continuous thoughts like these throughout the day: so this is what this is like? hmm... so I'm not teaching? and there are no papers to grade? and I can go to a holy hour at 8:00 in the morning? or get needed groceries? and fix the fan, etc.? There's so much I can do and get done! I'm sure, like any job, things will get redundant, dull, and/or boring, but right now I'm excited to be embracing my vocation as a wife, and offering up my work of taking care of our family (even if it's just two right now) and making a home - and being the heart of the home, Ex Corde Familiaris - to our Lord who in His goodness has blessed us so abundantly.

Today also marked a new beginning and exploration of new territory. Today I started on a seven day cleanse. For the past couple years I have been experiencing digestive troubles and with that a slew of ugly side affects of which I'll spare you. While there are many types of cleanses out there, and not many I would recommend, I've found one that seems as if it will help me to recover from what is ailing me. My next post will discuss and show (!) more of what this cleanse entails!

Sunday, August 15, 2010

The Journey Has Begun

On August 7, 2010 I was wed to the most holy, handsome, and strong man I know. Since that day we have been journeying together, now as one, and as our own little family.

Ex Corde Familiaris, meaning from the heart of the family, was chosen while reading a score of books during our engagement. Unfortunately, I can't remember which book prompted this title - and actually my husband came up with the official title - he's the Latin scholar. This book, as well as many others I've read, discussed the roles of male and female - husband and wife - in a family. I noted with particular interest that the woman is the heart of the home. Now, as a wife, I have a role and a mission - to be the heart of our family.

I bet being the heart of the home can manifest itself in many ways, and since I am only an eight-day-old wife, I have much to learn. Many adventures are sure to be had, and though I'm sure some will be difficult, and all will require deep strength and trust in our Lord, I hold that confidence that I have (finally) embraced the vocation to which the Lord has called me.

So, let's begin this grand adventure, and I will share my tales along the way...