Friday, December 10, 2010

A Word on Femininity


The following is a blog post I wrote for 1251: Queen of All Hearts. A blog devoted to sharing how a few women dress modestly. Enjoy!

How many of us would love to be described by others as feminine… enchanting… ravishing… captivating… charming… and alluring? Now, how many of us know of a woman in our life that fits these adjectives? Few come to my mind in the full sense of the word, and most have lived their lives and are now gone from this world. What does this say to us, except that it is a rarity to find a woman who enchants those around her with grace, compassion, humble listening, and a feminine nature.

Wait, wasn’t this supposed to be a blog about clothing?!

Right. Right. But think of those words again: feminine… enchanting… ravishing… captivating… charming… and alluring. Do these words come to mind when you think of dressing modestly?

Every woman desires to be beautiful, and each one of us would, I daresay, blush with embarrassment (albeit be more than pleased) if a dashingly handsome man complimented us with, “You look quite ravishing today, my lady.” But, alas! We live in the 21st century when most chivalry and respect has disappeared from common society… as has modesty. However, there still remains a place for modesty. And this is where it all begins…

Of all the women you may have imagined at the beginning of this post, I will bet that most of them dressed very modestly. Now, when you look up “modest” in the dictionary, you certainly won’t find those adjectives, but the true definition of modesty is found in those women. How is this so? Because -when a woman truly knows her dignity, knows of her deep and indispensable value to humankind, when she knows of her unique gifts, those of being a woman and being utterly irreplaceable, she will not only carve her way into the world with the love, light, and service she possesses, but she will take utmost care in communicating this inner beauty on her outside.

And so it is with you and I.

It is only until we understand our indispensable value - being a woman, and yes, being you, that we will begin to cultivate those virtues, serving those around us, and yes, dressing to reflect that beauty we each hold inside of us.

Sometimes I relate it to giving a gift to another, for that is what a woman is; she is truly a gift to humanity, one of the greatest treasures - each one a crown of creation. Now, picture a gift. This gift is a unique item, so unique in fact that no other exists of its kind on the planet. It is rare, and it is expensive. It is so beautiful that before the giver placed it in the box to be wrapped, many oohed and aahed over its beauty, others were reduced to silent awe. But tucked away, with many layers of tissue paper and into a sturdy box it was laid. A soft silver wrapping was carefully placed around the box and silk ribbons of a deep ruby were tied to fix the wrapping in place. All finished, it certainly was magnificent to behold, but still not anywhere near the beauty which remained tucked deep inside. It was ready to be given, but first another present needed to be wrapped. This one also of inestimable value, but quite different and unique in its own way. It also received the applaud and reverence of those who saw it before it was wrapped. However, this one was not done so carefully. Instead, it was placed in an old, beat up box with no tissue paper. The paper used to wrap the box wasn’t large enough to cover the whole package, and hastily it was done. In the end, no one would have guessed the beauty which it beheld. And they certainly didn’t. Each gift was given out, and each gift received the tidings itself communicated. I’m sure you know where this story is going by now… but how do you suppose the first gift was treated? Great excitement and intense curiosity inexplicably followed its receiving. For, if the gift looks this marvelous and splendid from the outside, the inside is sure to be a treasure. Unfortunately, the second gift fared much worse. Tossed to the side, due to its lack of interest, this gift was never opened.

And so it is - again - with you and I.

We hold immense power. Each and every day we send a message to the world. This is not only a message that declares to others how we think of ourselves, but also one in which we tell them how to treat us. We do this in our poise, our speech, our actions, and yes, our dress.

It’s certainly not easy choosing what to wear when one knows of her great power, but with great power comes great responsibility. I challenge you to think about those women you thought of at the beginning of this post. Ponder their virtues and their dress. What made them so alluring (to men and women alike)? What made them so feminine? And, how can you work to attain those same virtues, in manner and in dress, so as to give yourself as a gift to others and to reflect that great dignity which has been given to you from above?

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