Would you cut your toe nails in the pew before Mass?

"Why, of course not!" I hope you thought in your head, or perhaps you chuckled at the ridiculousness and absurdity of such a question, but unfortunately I witnessed just such a thing last evening.

There was a Mass being held to kick-off the religious education program at our church, and afterwards the students would have a chance to meet their teachers. I volunteered to fill in wherever needed this year and an 8th grade position opened up. So... that's where I am! Eighth grade - well, it certainly won't be boring! Anyway, back to the story...

So there I was, I had arrived at Mass some minutes beforehand so that I could prepare to receive our Lord. I try to sit up front in order to not be distracted, which would have been of high probability due to the amount of children, so I sat in the second row. A mother, her two daughters (or a daughter and a friend, I'm not sure which), and her son were sitting in the row ahead of me. While the church was by no means quiet, I knelt down to pray. I noticed as I was putting the kneeler down that the daughter was playing on her cell phone, momentarily I was a bit shocked, but then, not surprised. I was prompted to indignation at the lack of reverence and respect she was showing to our Lord, or rather at the mother's lack of direction to prompt her child to prayer, but I just tried to refocus on preparation for Mass. Not more than a moment later I heard, click, click, click, click.... click, click... and it kept going. It was followed by a whispered, but surprised, "Mom, what are you doing?!" And then a giggle. At this point, I was thoroughly distracted and opened my eyes to see the MOTHER CLIPPING HER TOE NAILS!

And then my heart broke.

Hot, fiery anger rose to my chest, and tears welled up in my eyes. Really? She's clipping her toe nails? In this holy place? Right before we pray together and receive God into our beings? Lord, how could she? Here was a mother who was showing these children that it was not only okay, but also appropriate to clip toe nails in church before Mass. Lord, have mercy. My anger quickly evaporated with my next thought. This woman probably has no idea, and little comprehension, or understanding of the sacredness of the Holy Eucharist. She probably doesn't understand the holiness of the ground on which she stands (or rather, sits). But these children! These poor children who are being led away from sanctity by their mother, the very person who is the primary educator of faith (along with her husband) to her children. She is supposed to lead them to heaven, but rather... well, I can't make presumptions, but would you say that by her actions she was leading her children to heaven?

Not knowing exactly what to do, and wanting to do five different things at once, (grab the clippers, gently explain to the children proper pre-Mass behavior, lecture the mother, cry, or pray fervently for their souls) I settled on a prayer that came immediately to my head: the Fatima prayer. There are many Fatima prayers and I'm not sure if this one has a specific name, but it gave me a chance to pray for this family, for all the families there, and for all those whose ignorance keeps them from loving and adoring our Lord.

My God I believe, I adore, I trust, and I love Thee,

and I ask pardon for all those who do not believe,

do not adore, do not trust, and do not love Thee.

Amen.

I was advised by a priest at my old parish to pray this three times in a row, but I found myself continuing beyond the three times. Throughout the prayer I felt sorrow for the family in front of me. I know that I, too, can be distracted in church, and at times need to be prompted back to reverence. Sometimes it's too easy to casually dismiss the call to proper preparation before Mass. In our humanness we can subconsciously avert our attention from the great mystery of the Holy Eucharist. At that moment, the Lord graced me with a tiny bit of the giant love He has for this family. They don't know any better. The mother might, but her children probably not. And what if she, too, grew up in a similar situation, and is only teaching her children what she knows? They did come to Mass. They didn't blow it off, or stay home to watch television, or whatever else people busy themselves with when they don't want to attend Mass.

In the last minutes before Mass began, I found my prayer raised to praise. Praise you, Lord, for this family, for this mother who brought her children to Mass, for even if she isn't showing the best example of reverence in church, at least by bringing her children to Mass she is showing them that it's important. Thank you, Jesus, for this family and the road they are traveling to holiness.

After all that, Mass began. It was probably the most distracting Mass I've ever been to, but it was Mass, and Jesus was there. I had to chuckle to myself then when at the homily Monsignor told the story of Our Lady of Fatima and taught all the children the prayer I had been prompted to pray before Mass!

Adventures West

It's been a wild ride these past couple weeks. After returning from our honeymoon, Casey and I drove up to Traverse City to rent a Uhaul and to pack up his stuff. We rambled down the highways to my parent's house outside Chicago to pack up all of my stuff, and finally we set off on the highway yet again to make a new home outside Des Moines, Iowa.

As a young girl I used to read Janette Oke books that were gifted to me. If you're unfamiliar with her writing, she writes Christian historical romance novels. I'm sure if I were to reread them now I would find them a bit cheesy, but to my young heart they gave a vision to the kind of man and the life I wanted to live if I were to get married, minus the covered wagons of course; they wouldn't exactly fit into this 21st century (sometimes my heart wishes they did, but I'll leave that for another post). It was precisely the scene of the newly married couple, sitting in their covered wagon along with their few belongings preparing to go West, that has stayed in my mind all these years. The adventure, the risk, and the act of truly leaving family and clinging to one another was and is absolutely beautiful to me.

I haven't thought of these books for years, but as Casey and I started off on the road, substituting a 26-foot Uhaul and tow dolly for the covered wagon, that scene popped back into my head. Here I was, a bride leaving family behind and setting off "West" with my husband to a place neither of us knew, but would soon be calling our home. I imagined along the way the hardships that those traveling West did experience, and thanked the Lord that that wasn't the case for us. Thank you, Lord, for paved highways! We arrived at our new apartment safely and soundly, and that's when the real fun began: unpacking. Praise the Lord for my super strong and hardworking husband! We both started bringing boxes into the apartment, but I really wanted to start unpacking the kitchen boxes. I knew Casey would be working up an appetite with moving all of our belongings. My wonderful husband didn't mind at all bringing in the rest of the boxes himself, and this allowed me to take care of at least one room.

It's been exactly one week since we arrived, and today was Casey's first day of work at his new job as Director of Faith Formation at a local parish. Casey and I both would like to live off of one income and hopefully have me available to stay home with our children, if God so blesses us. We decided we would like to start off living this way from the beginning, so today was my first day not going to work while Casey did. I have to admit, it's been a bit... different - of course, because I've never been a wife that didn't work before! But really, I've had continuous thoughts like these throughout the day: so this is what this is like? hmm... so I'm not teaching? and there are no papers to grade? and I can go to a holy hour at 8:00 in the morning? or get needed groceries? and fix the fan, etc.? There's so much I can do and get done! I'm sure, like any job, things will get redundant, dull, and/or boring, but right now I'm excited to be embracing my vocation as a wife, and offering up my work of taking care of our family (even if it's just two right now) and making a home - and being the heart of the home, Ex Corde Familiaris - to our Lord who in His goodness has blessed us so abundantly.

Today also marked a new beginning and exploration of new territory. Today I started on a seven day cleanse. For the past couple years I have been experiencing digestive troubles and with that a slew of ugly side affects of which I'll spare you. While there are many types of cleanses out there, and not many I would recommend, I've found one that seems as if it will help me to recover from what is ailing me. My next post will discuss and show (!) more of what this cleanse entails!

The Journey Has Begun

On August 7, 2010 I was wed to the most holy, handsome, and strong man I know. Since that day we have been journeying together, now as one, and as our own little family.

Ex Corde Familiaris, meaning from the heart of the family, was chosen while reading a score of books during our engagement. Unfortunately, I can't remember which book prompted this title - and actually my husband came up with the official title - he's the Latin scholar. This book, as well as many others I've read, discussed the roles of male and female - husband and wife - in a family. I noted with particular interest that the woman is the heart of the home. Now, as a wife, I have a role and a mission - to be the heart of our family.

I bet being the heart of the home can manifest itself in many ways, and since I am only an eight-day-old wife, I have much to learn. Many adventures are sure to be had, and though I'm sure some will be difficult, and all will require deep strength and trust in our Lord, I hold that confidence that I have (finally) embraced the vocation to which the Lord has called me.

So, let's begin this grand adventure, and I will share my tales along the way...

*Photo: Isela Maria Photography